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How a Court-Involved Therapist Leverages TalkingParents to Help Clients

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Kenny Levine, LCSW, is a seasoned therapist and coach with over 25 years of experience helping adults navigate life’s toughest challenges. Specializing in individual, couples, and co-parenting support, he uses CBT, DBT, and the Gottman Method. A Certified Discernment Counselor and active AFCC member, Kenny is committed to helping co-parents improve communication and center their children’s needs.

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Author
Kenny Levine Therapist & Coach Thrive Communication Skills LLC

What is court-involved therapy in co-parenting?

As a court-involved therapist based in Utah, when Levine works with co-parents, he primarily focuses on trying to better their relationship for the benefit of the kids.

“Co-parenting therapy may be agreed upon during mediation or ordered by a commissioner or judge. It usually comes into play when there are significant communication problems between the co-parents that are impacting the children’s well-being. Perhaps the children are being exposed to the litigation too much and are getting really polarized. Or the parents’ communication is so poor that they’re not coordinating with one another effectively, resulting in problems like the kids not getting picked up from school. In Utah, it’s common for a Private Guardian ad Litem to be appointed in situations like this to act as the child’s attorney.”

Levine says that his role is to try to improve the way the co-parents talk to each other.

“Sometimes the parents are just avoidant and there’s been a complete communication breakdown. Other times, domestic violence has been involved, and one parent is afraid to communicate with the other or there have been issues of coercive control.”

The dynamics can get quite complex, but Levine says he starts with trying to validate each person’s perspective and gives them tools to manage their emotional arousal around communicating with one another.

“When there has been a high level of conflict, it’s really about transitioning them from an adult relationship that once centered their feelings towards each other, and transitioning them to a more collegial, formal relationship that is solely focused on exchanging information about child centered logistics.”

How does TalkingParents support co-parents in court-involved therapy?

Levine says the recording capabilities of the app can help mitigate a lot of common problems he sees between co-parents.

“Each parent knows that if problematic co-parenting behavior is digitally captured during an interaction, it can be sent to me, and I can decide on the most appropriate therapeutic response. That might be a clinical intervention, and ultimately the Private Guardian ad Litem could be informed. That’s generally not something that either parent wants.”

He says that utilizing TalkingParents brings a sense of accountability to the communication.

Many times, there’s been a long history of problematic and ineffective communication between these co-parents. So, as soon as we say, okay, you’re not texting each other anymore. You’re not emailing. We’re moving to an app where everything is documented. That automatically sends a signal that the old way they’ve been talking is over and we’re starting a new way.

Levine says one of the things he likes most about the app is the recorded video calls.

“It’s common for the non-custodial parent to have video calls with their child. So, when there are issues where one parent is telling me that the other parent is coercing the child during their calls or saying inappropriate things, having these calls recorded can be important. There is an axiom in behavioral health, ‘that which is monitored improves,’ and that’s very much the case here.”

Additionally, in domestic violence situations, Levine says a co-parenting app helps create a sense of safety.

“The fact that you don’t have to disclose personal information like your phone number or email address, but you can still call and message one another, is huge. This allows us to set up boundaries around the communication, and I think that’s really effective on both sides.”

Advice from one court-involved therapist to others

One of Levine’s most crucial recommendations is to get your clients on the app from the get-go to signal the change in communication.

“I think some mental health providers hesitate to recommend an app because they want these co-parents to be able to communicate normally, and I can understand that. That’s a wonderful thing to hold as a goal. However, if they had the skills to do that right now, they probably wouldn’t need our services in the first place.”

He also says that mental health professionals should encourage parents to utilize TalkingParents to its fullest extent.

“The recorded calling is huge. I think it’s so important for co-parents to take advantage of that to monitor their interactions and help improve their behavior. I also highly suggest putting the child’s schedule directly into the app to help minimize the need for communication. Conflict requires interaction, so any way to decrease the volume of back-and-forth communication can be beneficial.”